Florida News

John C. Wickmeier, an associate of the Leave it to Beaver Federation has been charged with over indulgent Chicken Tacos consumption, which he says is an addiction and due to childhood feelings of abandonment, in which no chickens were ever allowed in his presence and because, his Aunt, one Priscilla Vanderplot, was arrested for stealing Rhode Island Red Hens from a local poultry farm, which she said she sacrificed for God.

Mr. Wickmeier is being sent to a local facility for observation. He has requested a nest, but local law officials say this is not a given. The defendant insists he once laid an egg.